Post by Revolver Boomstick on Mar 27, 2005 17:03:25 GMT -5
(Disclaimer - This in large part was taken from EWA. Don't sue me. Please.)
1. Egads, the vastly overdone UNDEAD Character!!!
- A 2000 year old vampire bent on domination of Chaotic Pro Wrestling? You don't say... well, I wish you hadn't, at the very least. Listen chum, only 13 year old pretentious fucktwits go around pretending to be some invincible demon or something. Sure, ten years ago, we all watched and loved The Undertaker. He kicked some serious ass. Shot lightning out of his ass. Rose from the Grave dozens of times. That's great, I loved it to, when I was ten. So why was it okay for him to do it, and not you? Simply put, it's overdone. Everyone and their mother rises from the grave these days, and sells like HHH to an old lady. It's not original anymore, and chances are you're not doing it half as well as some others have. Stop while you're ahead.
2. The Life of the Wealthy
- Everyone seems to be able to afford mansion homes these days and use the poor as stepping stones. Maybe I'm the only one who thinks this way, but last I checked CPW (nor any other wrestling promotion) gave out six figure paychecks. Most wrestlers, dependant on background, shouldn't be rich at all. Hell, they shouldn't be anything more than normal regarding finance. And NO ONE, I mean NO ONE under ANY circumstance should be richer than The Helms and Filth family. You're eating hot dogs, dammit, not caviare on a daily basis.
3. Life Sucks. Everything Sucks. I'm an angsty GOTH emo freak!
- This almost falls in the same place as UNDEAD characters. The difference being that Goth characters don't necassarilly rely on supernatural elements to further their conquest of CHRONIC EVIL ANGST SYNDROME. Their is a major problem with this, and that is that everyone tries to do it. And they all try to be evil. And by Evil, I mean Korn and Slipknot, otherwise known as Backstreet Boys with guitars. Most of the time you'll play into your own stereo type and only make your character blend into the background. Without a good twist, good contrast, interesting depth... like any character, but this type moreso, your character will fail to impress.
4. We get it, you're an arrogant jackass.
- Arrogant people are weak, admit it. When's the last time a face actually called out HHH and he ACTUALLY GOT INTO THE RING TO KICK SOME ASS? That's what I thought. As a cocky heel, you're naturally going to be a ponce. Act like one instead of Captain Commando who is generally perfect in every way, despite his attitude. As a cocky face, the opposite is true. You're going to rush in a battle completely outnumbered, stand no chance in hell, but bah gawd are you going to run fast and beat the shit out of the first person you see. Point is, cockiness is a trait to be exploited and defined, but not a ruling aspect of your character. It has side effects, it can determine actions, but in no way should it ever dominate any one persons ideal. And, try to be cocky for a reason. Maybe you won a match against a veteran, have an impressive win record, or ate the worlds record of hot dogs in a single night. YOU CANT BE COCKY FOR JUST SITTING ON YOUR ASS AND GETTING THE TOP TIME IN METAL GEAR SOLID 3!!! Wait... yeah you can. But only if your name begins with B and ends in oomy.
5. You won the spelling bee? Pullitzer Prize? Discovered the cure to all forms of cancer? YOU'RE A GENIUS!!!
- If wrestlers had the IQ of a renowned scientist, they'd be in a different profession. And be paid a hell of a lot more. Mind games, ring psychology, that's all great. It pertains to your profession, your character. But knowing everything, exactly what to say and do... it's not reallistic. Even Curt Hennig had to wipe his own ass, you know.
6. I'm Hard-Fucking Core.
- So you wanna be XTREEEEEEME? Wanna spill a little blood? Then remember that you too, have spilled blood. It's all about bumps and bruises, people. You'll have injuries, your leg will hurt, and you wont be the brightest apple to fall from the tree. Some hardcore characters can be well versed in wrestling ability... but none of them should ever be a Kurt Angle in the ring.
- Most people have gimmicks of some type, even if they don't reallize it. It is our gimmicks that set one character apart from the next. Some though, hurt a character more than help him or her.
1. Egads, the vastly overdone UNDEAD Character!!!
- A 2000 year old vampire bent on domination of Chaotic Pro Wrestling? You don't say... well, I wish you hadn't, at the very least. Listen chum, only 13 year old pretentious fucktwits go around pretending to be some invincible demon or something. Sure, ten years ago, we all watched and loved The Undertaker. He kicked some serious ass. Shot lightning out of his ass. Rose from the Grave dozens of times. That's great, I loved it to, when I was ten. So why was it okay for him to do it, and not you? Simply put, it's overdone. Everyone and their mother rises from the grave these days, and sells like HHH to an old lady. It's not original anymore, and chances are you're not doing it half as well as some others have. Stop while you're ahead.
2. The Life of the Wealthy
- Everyone seems to be able to afford mansion homes these days and use the poor as stepping stones. Maybe I'm the only one who thinks this way, but last I checked CPW (nor any other wrestling promotion) gave out six figure paychecks. Most wrestlers, dependant on background, shouldn't be rich at all. Hell, they shouldn't be anything more than normal regarding finance. And NO ONE, I mean NO ONE under ANY circumstance should be richer than The Helms and Filth family. You're eating hot dogs, dammit, not caviare on a daily basis.
3. Life Sucks. Everything Sucks. I'm an angsty GOTH emo freak!
- This almost falls in the same place as UNDEAD characters. The difference being that Goth characters don't necassarilly rely on supernatural elements to further their conquest of CHRONIC EVIL ANGST SYNDROME. Their is a major problem with this, and that is that everyone tries to do it. And they all try to be evil. And by Evil, I mean Korn and Slipknot, otherwise known as Backstreet Boys with guitars. Most of the time you'll play into your own stereo type and only make your character blend into the background. Without a good twist, good contrast, interesting depth... like any character, but this type moreso, your character will fail to impress.
4. We get it, you're an arrogant jackass.
- Arrogant people are weak, admit it. When's the last time a face actually called out HHH and he ACTUALLY GOT INTO THE RING TO KICK SOME ASS? That's what I thought. As a cocky heel, you're naturally going to be a ponce. Act like one instead of Captain Commando who is generally perfect in every way, despite his attitude. As a cocky face, the opposite is true. You're going to rush in a battle completely outnumbered, stand no chance in hell, but bah gawd are you going to run fast and beat the shit out of the first person you see. Point is, cockiness is a trait to be exploited and defined, but not a ruling aspect of your character. It has side effects, it can determine actions, but in no way should it ever dominate any one persons ideal. And, try to be cocky for a reason. Maybe you won a match against a veteran, have an impressive win record, or ate the worlds record of hot dogs in a single night. YOU CANT BE COCKY FOR JUST SITTING ON YOUR ASS AND GETTING THE TOP TIME IN METAL GEAR SOLID 3!!! Wait... yeah you can. But only if your name begins with B and ends in oomy.
5. You won the spelling bee? Pullitzer Prize? Discovered the cure to all forms of cancer? YOU'RE A GENIUS!!!
- If wrestlers had the IQ of a renowned scientist, they'd be in a different profession. And be paid a hell of a lot more. Mind games, ring psychology, that's all great. It pertains to your profession, your character. But knowing everything, exactly what to say and do... it's not reallistic. Even Curt Hennig had to wipe his own ass, you know.
6. I'm Hard-Fucking Core.
- So you wanna be XTREEEEEEME? Wanna spill a little blood? Then remember that you too, have spilled blood. It's all about bumps and bruises, people. You'll have injuries, your leg will hurt, and you wont be the brightest apple to fall from the tree. Some hardcore characters can be well versed in wrestling ability... but none of them should ever be a Kurt Angle in the ring.